day 4/5 part 2

...continued
so overall without my bag! having had a shower, feeling refreshed, i set off to meet one of my 'friends' who wishes to remain nameless. anyway my travels with them included smoking weed and somehow led me from the city centre to cheetham hill. where we travelled by met and unusually, we departed the met at abraham moss as apposed to crumpsall. meaning we walking towards cheetham hill village from a town direction rather than towards town from a heaton park direction. when we hear a beep. usually a car horn is somebody frantically waving and smiling expectantly at me so i whipped my head round at record speed. i cant remember what car it was but it was something you'd expect a CEO or very successful *insert whatever profession here* to have. the car was traveling in the same direction as us which i didnt expect before i turned but i soon noticed who it was. my dad. if youre reading this and youre a stranger or dont know me well then youll probably think either A. im lying about the unexpectedness or B. so what youve only been homeless four days why you buzzing, you probably saw him before you left and text him that youre safe everyday. fact is, not that they dont attempt to, i rarely see any of my parents. last time i seen him was january in morrisons in whitefield, which was also weird and unexpected as i no longer live/lived at the time anywhere near whitefield, and since i only visit 1 or 2 places when i am in whitefield im rarely strolling through morrison. since the majority of my family live in whitefield, its not that strange to see my dad in morrisons. but when the grape vine told me he no longer lived in the country it was. not as weird as this occasion though, on cheetham hill road. speaking of roads, he swerved his car on to the wrong side of the road, parking momentarily on the lane oncoming traffic should use. £40 fine apparently but i suppose were both impulsive and care free in some respects and scenarios. anyway me and my friend ground to a halt, my dad got out his car, initial greetings, and we had a conversation that lasted no longer than 2 minutes in total! he asked how i was, how it was going, how i was doing, informed me he'd just been discussing me with his friend which sparked the cliche reaction "saying what" which he replied "about your blog!" to be honest im aware i write shit that parents dont like, family dont like, friends probably dont like. but im also aware im not even mildly arsed about any of that, all i can do is what i want to, regardless how much im told thats now how life works. ive by this point in life discovered people discuss you behind your back, whether negatively or positively in a way that they wouldnt if you were present. the same way in the group chat you might call your teacher/tutor/lecturer/boss/coworker a stupid cunt for making you stay an hour later, whilst in person, although you may show that youre less than impressed, youd never dream of branding them a stupid cunt. just illogical. for this reason, i knew he wouldnt say anything that he actually said privately, because even if it was outstanding, my parent is always to be my harshest critic as it somehow directly reflects/is seen as a reflection of them as parents. he did what any parent would do, especially one who was aware his son was homeless whether through choice or not, and gave me a 3 figure sum. i cant lie. i was battling with the idea of this. on the one hand, i had £3 in my pocket and i love the idea of having money to waste, on the other hand until this point i'd had a totally authentic homeless experience. i now had too many things to consider, considering i was very tired, my legs were very bored of walking, i was very bored of the company i was with i thought it was a test. not from my dad, and not from god cause i only believe in him when im praying someone hasnt ate the food i left in the fridge. but from something. a "lets see if you practice what you preach or if you spend it on weed, food and meaningless tasks." it wouldnt be uncharacteristic for me to spend the whole lot in less than 3 hours on shit i didnt want or was asked to purchase from others. so i simply didnt spend any until i was on my way back towards town where i bought a met ticket as there was hella metheads on the platform id now be departing on, on the way here.

so im on the met with my mate still and im high as fuck by the way. so high infact when i seen Geo Crowe and Bev before im sure they probably assumed i was on heroin. that was a strange situation to be fair, id seen two people at the same spot at the same time, none of which i was expecting. and all three of us had to quickly alter into not only, theres an adult around mode. but theres an adult around, who is our friends mum and also the woman who allowed me to be mentally ill in her home for almost a year, when she didnt have to and probably after a month didnt want to, mode. Geo had already asked me "what have you had?" in the typical Geo manner that is just naturally concerned for your well being whilst shocked and slightly disgusted! i'd had nothing but 2 zoots of regular weed but it was a madness this time. must've been the over-tiredness i assume. anyway to make the situation worse it was Bev's birthday and i had no idea. seeing as her birthday also marks 2 years ago since i moved into her home, i just felt guilty, and that wasnt the only reason why. so yeah, im blazed on the met and im approached again unexpectedly by my fellow bad bitch Harris, Abbie! were having a catch up, asking about each others lives and all that good stuff! she tells me she loves the blog, i thank her tell her i love her face.
before long were at victoria... where we get off. my motive at this point is to go to a bar and get pissed, then change bar get more pissed, and buy weed and get high and that's it really, so i intend to do so... unfortunately didn't go quite so smoothly and i ended up buying a pint of cider and cordial for about £5odd and didnt drink even half of the fucker. im such a lightweight though i was feeling it behind my eyes. anyway now im on my own, at victoria met stop. again. thirty minutes after the previous time. all i can think in my head is, buy Matt (the man from day 3) a new mouse to make up for his dead one and then you can spend the rest on whatever you want good deed done. obviously also would've given other people money throughout the day/night but that wasnt on my immediate to do list right now! all that was, was to meet the twins at 5.30 and to buy this mouse. so from victoria i walk to the only pet shop i know, which is in-between broughton and town. when i arrived, baring in mind my legs are just getting sorer and my brain tireder, i asked the man behind the counter for a mouse, he said "were only an aquarium mate" im like you actually mad. so i left, checking the sign on the front whilst leaving. its called something like OASIS and there's a fish incorporated into the logo somewhere. im feeling dumb as shit and decide im not walking again so i get the bus back into town. as you can tell im already, spending, who even buys met tickets and pays for the bus? especially not someone who was homeless as an excuse. some would argue they're vital purchases and considering i actually saw met heads on the way in, it did actually make sense. but without the money i wouldnt be mooching to fish shops to buy mice. so on the bus i use firstwifi (WHICH IN COMPARISON TO METROLINK OR STAGECOACH WIFI MAY ASWELL NOT EXIST, TYPE ON SENTENCE AND IT TELLS YOU, YOU CANT DO ANYTHING ELSE FOR 24 HOURS!) to locate a pet shop that sells mice, one closes at 5.30 and im meant to be meeting the twins then anyway so, its semi practical. so i swoop by Matt on my way through town, to the pet shop and say, do you want a new mouse, ill buy you one, and ive never seen anyone so happy! hes thanking me bare and just smiling almost as if, id gone to the iPhone box in midd and revived his other one.
so i get to the pet shop and they only sell frozen mice. sweet, any rats? no! anything else? weve got gerbils! to be honest before this i thought a gerbil was a hamster, not a cute mouse look-a-like... so its perfect, yes ill have one please. then! she says have you got a cage for it? im like no??? its for a homeless man, i assumed he could just feed and play with it like he did the other. she wouldnt let me leave without a cage, food, a "hide" for it to retreat to, wood chippings for the cage floor and something it has to use to make a bed out of. fucking hell okay! she warned me the gerbil may die from the cold and it would be unethical, but he said he wanted it, ive already asked, and he did break my heart yesterday. so i get it all, i spend over £50 and leave with a large bin bag, a small 5p plastic bag and a gerbil in a cardboard box. so im walking towards him thinking yes he'll love it. boy was i wrong. he basically looked at it said it was cute, said he loved it, thanked me then made me watch his sleeping bag and things whilst he went chemist, when he return he was shouting at me to fuck off and take it with him cause he didnt want it. i assumed he was joking. he wasnt. i wanted to trap his head in the cage door and banish him to another world! but i just was bare confused, tired, slightly upset and slightly thinking, wow should've just bought cocaine even if all it does is make me shit. at least someone wouldve benefited even if only temporarily! so now im just stressed as fuck. thinking what kind of dickhead even does that. and im meant to be meeting Hope and Millie, ive just got rid of my bags, now i've got to cart around a live animal and its unnatural habitat.
Hope and Millie arrive to town where they find me at the end of my tether. cotemplating taking the rodent and its shit back, but the shops shut until tomorrow and that means carrying it, until tomorrow. and it might die. so now i've got a pet gerbil as soon as they arrive the stress must be apparent because were immediately back in a taxi towards their home they just left! were all stood around thinking wag the fuck 1. trying to build this fucking cage, with the woman on the youtube tutorial making a brisk jog in the desert look like a walk in the park. im livid. im thinking about cutting matt off for life! i cant comprehend, what could've happened on that trip to the chemist. but i also cannot believe i actually did a nice thing that back fired. should've got him a milkshake from the market he'd probably be buzzing!

so im in the twins house, with my gerbil by which point we've named Ollie because the cage says Twist on. i dont know whether to eat the gerbil and take the apparatus back tomorrow, pretending i forgot i already had a cage or just to let it out into the road, broadcasting none of these thoughts. meanwhile, slowly behind the scenes, the Katana's are growing ever so attached to Ollie. he now lives in their 3rd bathroom looooool. anyway they allow me de-stress and unwind in the best way we know possible. marijuana, and after a while we head back to town where we part ways and plan to see eachother soon.

im dropped in town by uber, so walking with my sore legs, is something i have'nt experienced, in a while except walking indoors or to and from taxis. its painful and im still calling myself a nonce in the head for buying a childs pet for a bipolar, probably never had a mouse in the first place man. so im walking and walking and walking. my ipod dies and my phones on the brink, all i can think is mcdonalds. but as im barred i cant stomach it, so i walk further, to the mcdonalds on actual oxford road near the hospitals etc. fucking nonce i am because it didnt even have plug sockets and the big mac was deadington. from there i dont know what to do, i no longer feel safe on the streets sleeping without a sleeping bag because of how tired i am meaning i would'nt wake up even if getting anally penetrated. so i decide there's only two options:
Cheetham Hill AGAIN to go tesco!
or Eastlands asda!
i chose asda, just out of loyalty really! biggest mistake, took 1.3 hours to get there and the pain once i arrived was unbearable! being told they only sold sleeping bags in summer made me want to pierce my eyeball with a fork and if i could have accessed tears, i would've! refusing to have walked all that painful way without getting something i buy 3 koppabergs for £5. i could'nt even open them with a lighter and the luck i was having id probably snap a tooth using them so i just kept them in the bag and intended to go to sleep at the metstop right beside asda. EASTLANDS ASDA HOWEVER, THE CUNTS, BLAST SHIT MUSIC EXTERNALLY AT NIGHT TIME! i couldnt even be arsed hearing it. every time (once again...) i close my eyes i hallucinate! im tired, im achey, im bored, im lonely and i cant be fucking arsed! so i walk back to town, holding my shoes in one hand, and holding my beers in the other.
when i get back to town, i lie face down on a bench, clutching my koppabergs for dear life and pass out! what happens next is single handedly the weirdest thing to happen yet! I WOKE UP AT MARKET STREET METROLINK! on the seats, specifically the middle one, with no koppabergs! but the rest of my belongings! i can simply not comprehend how exactly i arrived here? did i walk in my sleep? did i even do to asda or was that a dream! it wasn't just ask my legs! but if none of these, how did i get here and where are my beers? if i was knocked out enough to not have my beers why would they not also take my phone and iPod? I'm so confused and so relieved! what i did next (as I'm waiting for the library to open as i often am) was plan to just nap outside the library until 9am so i can go in and type out my blog posts! my brain is honestly cabbaged and when i arrive at the library to slumber, you can imagine my anger to be shooed away! told i had to "move on" because "people would be going to work soon!"
thats when i got to starbucks! which is where i first began to write part 1! whilst in starbucks i was feeling so shit i simply bought a hot chocolate so i could sleep! my friend Milliana (who is twins with Hope!) snapped me to check my wellbeing as they both (as well as others but mostly these two) did regularly. at least a couple times per day! so anyway she messaged me and although regularly id reply "ye all's good, I'm fine, how're you?" probably add a brief description of my day! however this time looking like this:

it was hard to deny i was feeling raggedy! she said i could slump in her back garden! at first i wondered if this was cheating? after a while i agreed realising, i could not successfully document the experiencing if i was feeling emotionally and physically drained! so i did just that! slept on the floor in the back garden! for 13 hours! best sleep ever although i woke up with two puffy eyes! but being the fabulous bad and boujie host's that they are... they made me delicious meals, ice cold beverages and restored my faith in humanity! 

sorry i took so long to write these there has been hella complications mostly in the sense that you cannot upload pictures to the blog anywhere other than MMU

love the support and everything from everyone so far! you're honestly all sick!

day 4/5 part 1

It's been a loooooong day, I woke up at some time around 6:45am at market street met stop, I DID NOT fall asleep there and wherever I did fall asleep I had 3 koppabergs with me. Sure you can guess I didn't when I woke up! I still owned all the rest of my belongings though so sweet. I've been awake (I've honestly had only tiny naps, in places you're not allowed to sleep, therefore being awoken by shooing orders from an official! Don't understand how in someone's job description there is a clause that either outright says or suggests, get rid of desperate people, who've probably not chosen a certain spot for any other reason than being shooed from the last and really just need some comfort! As if anyone thinks, ay up, if I could sleep ANYWHERE in the world right now, it'd be shudehill bus station! Fuck off. Anyway. I'm sat in Starbucks. I didn't want the hot chocolate so much that I didn't even add sugar or stand for 10 minutes adding vanilla, chocolate and whatever the other nice one that isn't nutmeg, powders to the cream on top acting as though the vigorous wrist actions were drastically altering the flavour. It's gone luke warm, the cream still untouched however misshapen and theirs a brim of scum. The only reason I bought it was so I can argue in case I fall asleep and they try to shoo.
Places I've been shoed from since last post:
Shudehill. Twice. once just told to wake up, once told to move on)
Outside central library, if you count the time I woke up at market street beerless, homeless, will to go onless, that'd make 3 times. They let me in...

... I'm not longer in Starbucks, I've re woke after 13 hours sleep in my friends' back garden, on a bed made up of, firstly, a cardboard guitar box, opened out to about a 1x1.5m rectangular shape on the floor! Secondly, a pink bed sheet, spread over the cardboard for more confort. My legs are engulfed in a mermaid tail blanket which paired with the two blankets and the cushion to lay my head makes up the comfiest bed I've slept in since the night before i left. I woke up with a new eye shape however, wish I wish I knew why but I simply do not! So what I have to do now is fill you in from the last post two now, not particularly sure where one day ended and the other begins so what I shall do, is name the post day 4/5 and do it in part 1 and 2. I'd by lying if I split them equally down the middle and pretended each day was different cause if they're only split by 3 different 15 minute kips. They're not particularly different days.
So there I was, wringing the last blog post MMU university with Kayla and Nicole (the two girls who are creating a documentary for uni about my journey!) because I'd been taking so long to write it and complete it (day 3) they'd left me to go and get food at which point I ensured them I'd be done within 20 minutes, which uncharacteristically I was. What we was going to do was capture the first footage for the documentary! What I had intended was to get filmed brushing my teeth in a park and just an interview then maybe so footage walking around town. So I left the uni and met the girls who were walking towards me, we went straight to the park to capture me brushing my teeth. When we arrived, unexpectedly, their was a food station just outside the front of the park! I'd never known or seen this particular soup kitchen before, so obviously (although I wasn't hungry) it made sense to get footage (for the documentary) of me eating the food and to also ask the owners questions! They'd said they'd been there for 6 years doing it I assume once weekly!

After I'd ate we just got more footage including the footage of me brushing my teeth using a bottle of water I filled up in the uni and me doing other tasks! We headed off into the city centre to try and capture more footage on the way. Not much point detailing every detail of this as it is actually capture. The other reason being it was so long ago and I didn't note it I can't actually remember. If this post was only to capture the last 12 hours I would've probably went into detail about each step I'd taken but it'd just be unnecessary considering more important things have happened since. Anyway so me, Kayla and Nicole are walking through town discovering another homeless feeding station and more nice people which we interviewed, after this we walked to an area near Selfridges to see the soup kitchen I'd be the day previously with Jason but it wasn't there! At which point we decided to part ways as we were meeting again on Saturday where they'd be with me from about 8pm-1am filming what street life is like. So anyway we ended up going the same way and at the hotel where they both worked! When we got there I was told I could leave my heavy as fuck bags in a cloakroom at which point I received a little ticket with a number on to give in when I returned in order to redeem my bags back. If never been on the homeless journey,  without that bag so as you can imagine the first few steps felt as though an enormous weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. literally. Baring in mind the time here is about 20 to 10pm on Wednesday! Okay so we're no longer together. I'd begin doing what I do best which was simply just travelling around aimlessly. The thing is because you've been wandering around the same area for such a long time you begin to realise, for example:
If you've been to Nothern Quarter tonight, and you're housed, you can clearly and vividly remember the last time you'd been here, regardless how intoxicated or how long ago. So whether it be, last December for the works do, last week for drinks before a concert, last weekend to buy some trainers from Note or Oi Polloi or even everyday in the past week for work or otherwise. You'd know when. Whereas homeless, you simply don't know? It'd be like asking how many times in the past 4 days have you walked past your toaster? If you know, you're either very calculated and probably got a mental disorder or you don't have a toaster so the answer is zero. Having been aimlessly wondering around both solo and grouped, through the same areas, all day and night, for for four days and nights, you tend only to remember faces rather than places! You may even be able to place where you lastant seen that face. Which would only have been 1 time you'd seen that face. In that place. Not taking into consideration how many faces you've seen, and how many places you've been recently and the fact that you're also not particularly arsed about seeing places or people. However more just creating a to do list of tasks to pass time. So at 1am you could be walking down Deansgate, having been in spinning fields smoking a cigarette, towards Market Street. However, now at 4am you're walking down Deansgate towards the locks to look for a comfy place to rest. Baring in mind you've probably been somewhere on Deansgate at least twice the day before overall, its hard to keep track. It's not only Deansgate either, its Piccadilly Gardens, Oxford Road, Market street, Everywhere!

-new location finally at a computer so i can bang these out-
so as you can tell, im just aimlessly travelling with each step adding to the fatigue my legs are having to endure. i decided then to just sit and people watch on a quiet canal, with not much footfall. basically i was from the outset and throughout looking for somewhere to nap but not admitting it to myself. i think i managed to maybe doze off for 20 minutes but soon after i was back on my travels. this particular journey led me to wifi... although most places in town have free wifi, it still sometimes feels like trying to draw ketchup from a poodle when most ask you for a mobile number, that they'll then text, with a code to join the wifi. fuck off no sim. my mood at this point deteriorating, im feeling extremely anti social, and i feel like if i hear the word 'homeless' again ill spontaneously combust. using the wifi i found, i had a snapchat off riley saying he was en route home from work and was coming into town to travel home. 4 messages later we were meeting, which we did and it involved me walking beside him to broughton and then turning around alone and travelling back into town. when i arrived back in to town my mission was to find any one id met previously during the last 4 or so days. so i went to the carpark where id been on my first night back to floor 7, expecting to see them. they werent there so i just began to descend however this tie using the stairs. this is where i met a man, who didnt tell me name or age, cause he knew about the blog after i told him and he was excited to be featured however wished to remain as anonymous as possible. sweet. bullet point bob is back, this is how he described himself before homelessness whilst smoking both crack and heroin:
- he was a "functioning crackhead"
- he could still sell heroin whilst addicted to crack
- his gilfriend once she discovered that he sold heroin used to pester him let her try and and to share his supplies
- she didnt always know he took drugs but once she did it caused a downward spiral in the relationship because he could spend more money on it, blatantly some it in and around home, in front of and with her as apposed to "sneaking off to moke it in the bathroom"
- by this point theyre both "functioning crackheads"
- when they'd been together 3 and a half years he bagan working in sales and was made redundant 8 years into the relationship.
- being made redundant meant his already rocky relationship began to become worse as his girlfriend didnt work and he was the breadwinner
- he claimed he got evicted 4 months after this as he didnt read no reply to a letter saying his rent was due, he claims the letter fell between the fridge and the cooker.
- when the, whoever came to evict him came, he said he had a grand in his pocket but it was too late which meant he had to move
- he started selling drugs again and he was doing nothing but sitting in and selling drugs
- at this point he was introduced to then legal highs, mkat and "monkey dust"
- he said he declined from being strong headed because "monkey dust makes everyone go crazy!"
- even when he ran out of mkat, monkey dust or crack he said he'd NEVER resort to heroin
- he first took heroin aged 30 and hes been addicted ever since
- he began smoking it in spliffs, which naturally progressed to "tooting" although he remained adamant hed "NEVER INJECT DRUGS" as it came with diseases and complications.
- he described heroin by referring back to Ray Charles and Jimi Hendrix saying similarly to weed it makes you creative and he sometimes felt his brain was at its sharpest whilst on the drug
- he "has a soft spot" for heroin and he said he thought the first time he tried it he would be able to dabble with it once and not become addicted!
- his family first began to realise he was addicted to some king of drugs because they would find the foil tracks about. which in turn made him start "lying, being sly and using his brain"
 - when he broke up with his girlfriend of 9 years and he began to miss her he turn to doing more and more heroin.
- he has "done the rattle nuff times"
- he said that addiction is an illness and i asked him if it was "like being on a diet but eating a cake a day" which he corrected into "being on a diet and pigging out everyday!"
- heroin is by far his favorite drug. 
he continued to list the differences between crack and heroin but we were interuppted by a carpark official. he told him hed already shooed him once today and he needs to leave, he said i can go to although i was simply sat writing on the stairs making notes. but unlike the mcdonalds situation, i understand why i had to leave too. i immediately got in the lift but the men stayed and argued, i was stood in the lift waiting for him to join me but after 30 seconds and the man saying he was going to take pictures as hed seen him this morning, i just vacted.
when i left, i was walking from the shudehill carpark down towards birdcage, when i seen my friend from my last job, and her other friend, walking away from birdcage as if they were leaving. "jasmine is that you?" it was. she as soon as heard my voice and saw me began to cry, saying "boston, please come and stay at mine, i dont want you out here!" although she was drunk i knew she was genuine as on night 1 we was snap chatting me for half an hour about the same thing! she'd also told her mum about me, and she said her mum was worried, since ive never met her mum the fact they'd discussed me meant she was surely serious. i had to confirm i couldnt stay at her house, but i could potentially come to her area. she tried her up most to sway me to follow with her but after my persistence she agreed i was fine and we went to dixy, where nomatter how much i insisted id eaten she bought me a chicken burger meal and tried to get money out for me, i accepted the food, but the money too far so we parted ways before it happened, her getting in a taxi, me heading towards piccadilly gardens, eating. when i got to piccadilly gardens my food was gone, obviously, but i headed to gay village, where a woman told me i was beautiful as i walked past a bar, which resulted in her boosting my ego for 5 minutes, whilst i acted as though i wasnt loving every second. when i left her i walked past the take away's, looking in randomly i see no other than! DIAMOND. ONEISHA. GREEN! i wont even go into detail about that just know she was being typical diamond, but drunk diamond, drunk barefoot eating pizza diamond. i had to tell her "diamond, youre acting like a rhinestone" and she told me "sack yoa mom!" 
after that, i sucked my mum with a mcdonalds straw and im still here now. joke i just continued to wander around gay village after she got in her taxi and this gay man started following me, i turned round flirting; in a you could never kinda way. clearly thinking i was fit because id just been ego boosted by a randomer. anyway he started stroking his dick and insinuating follow him. i told him i was homeless and had been for the past 4 days but he didnt care. i acted as though i didnt either to gain a cigarette then left him because anyone who would suck homeless dick would suck anything. and although that doesnt particularly bother me, youd have to be wearing NOT WHAT HE WAS. (V NECK, SCHOOL JUMPER BLUE NOT DENIM PANTS AND CANT EVEN REMEMBER THE REST, BUT YOUD NEED TO BE WEARING A TRACKSUIT AND LOOKING LIKE YOU SPIT BARS OR SELL MD OR IM NOT FEELING YA RIGHT NOW!) after this i had to just waste time till 9am and the library opened. and i had to film at 10am with Kayla and Nicole for the documentary so i just continued walking around. shock.
what happened after the library opened was i went in and began to write this, which i ended up scrapping, and restarting and going to a place where homless people can receive showers and food in the morning and sometimes evenings called barnabus! located in the gay village. i wont go into too much detail about that as it will be featured in the documentary however i showered, got footage with Kayla and Nicole and got some new gloves, socks and boxers (all brand new!) 
post shower i felt amazing, almost as if i'd never been homeless, although i was wearing the same clothes, i felt so fresh, a spring in my step and new lease of life.

what happened next includes: 
gaining £110 
buying a gerbil and a cage and all the trimmings
smoking weed
meeting more friends
hallucinations
waking up somewhere different to where i fell asleep
and 
a 13 hour sleep in Hope and Millie's backgarden

all of this will be in part 2! along with all pics for this post. unfortunately have to go somewhere else to upload the pics

day 3

I planned this post whilst high! Which means it may be chatting shit in some areas! Had my first three drags of a zoot!!!!!!!!! I'll tell you that bit later. It wasn't spice it was weed!
Very long post today cause I've had a very intense day to tell the complete truth.

 

Brief overview of the main points!
- Soup kitchen
- Banned for life form McDonalds (by association
- Rain
- SARAH THE SAVIOUR AND FIRST THREE DRAGS OF A ZOOT
- Rain (new lease of life)
- Matt: the best person I've met so far and definitely one who put shit into perspective
So what I shall do from now on, is bullet point post like this with titles, decided it makes for an easier read!
SOUP KITCHEN
So after I uploaded Day 2 I stayed in the library for a bit, by this point it's 7pm! So I decided to change the positioning/layering of my clothes putting my hoody under my jumper, changing my socks to white ones, revealing my dungarees again and all that jazz. Minor part really in comparison to what's to follow! So anyway don't know how, mustn't be that relevant but i ended up sat on the stairs of the Royal Exchange Theatre next to TGIs entrance, having just fully charged both my phone and iPod I was feeling good. But not that good but j was fine. So after changing my shoes I decided to analyse the behaviour of passers by! I noticed:
A. My back hurts from this bag.
B. I haven't begged once at all at this point and still haven't begged now actually!
C. People either see you before you see them and avoid looking in your direction as they walk by. I'm guilty of this in the past.
D. Or they look at you until you look at them at which point they look away as fast as they possibly can!
E. Or if their in a group or couple, the other side of the road suddenly that instant begins to look marvellous, similarly so does their partners face. Whatever joke is made previously is suddenly 5 times funnier. So much funnier in fact they have to look, down or up or diagonally to laugh at it over dramatically!
Since as I previously stated I haven't begged once nor even insinuated I wanted anything from them I don't actually understand why they're all so avoidant. But I do. Cause I've been guilty of more than just point A.
F. I'm not yet bored of my iPod songs which is surprising since I get bored of them on a single met journey usually!
So anyway there I am sat there minding my own business and a fella. Jason. real name this as he's nothing to hide or conceal. Asked me if I was homeless, to which I replied yes, to which he replied follow me. At this point I'm unsure if he's homeless or not himself. Anyway I follow, he states were going to soup kitchen. Now I know people go to NQ soup kitchen for a boogie and a night out sometimes so I'd be LYING if I was not buzzing thinking "YAAAAAAS HIT THE BLOODY JACKPOT JAYJAYS TAKING ME FOR COCKTAILS" he wasn't. He was homeless too but he was taking me to this organisation open 7.30-9pm called "coffee for craig". All I know is what I can assume. Which is someone called Craig may have been homeless and died therefore this organisation was set up to ensure no one else did. So an organisation doing good in Craig's honour? I don't know. Anyway C4C offer food and sleeping bags (if theirs any which there wasn't) etc for homeless people. So they had about 500 each of Greggs, sausage rolls, cakes, pastries, chicken bakes the lot! Greggs give the (I assume?) volunteers the produce they can't sell as apposed to throwing them in the bin. Also there was tea, coffee and rice with chicken I think not sure only had a sausage roll and chicken bake. And friendly staff and nice atmosphere. Jason, my new mate, I was only with for a total of 8 minutes I think, so I don't know much about him other than he was respectable. He didn't mention drugs once or seem to be rattling so from what I know he was potentially clean but he may have just not got round to telling me yet, he was more a tour guide than a latch-on-ya fella. At this point I haven't had any zoots or anything even slightly mindset altering except maybe the slight tipsy feeling from the 3 beers from night one.

BANNED FROM MCDONALDS FOR LIFE.
So I went to maccies and spent £2 of my final £3 on a bus ticket Big Mac and fries. Sweet? Then I ate it all. Sweet? Then I remained sat using the wifi dealing with my 1000 notifications. Sweet? Then I wrote a Facebook status saying I was about to leave and search for homeless people to find out what they do in the rain. Sweet? So I swap shoes from my vans back to my 110s and intend to leave. Sweet? Not sweet cause another homeless man sees me and comes sits opposite me. Which to me is sweet. But he's there for about 30 seconds before the security guard (of McDonalds) approaches ordering me out the restaurant. Why? What did I do I hear you ask. Well here's the answer. LIAM FROM YESTERDAY WHO SMOKED BRANDY AND WHISKEY IN THE BOGS HAS GOT ME BANNED BY ASSOCIATION. NOT ONLY THIS BECAUSE I WAS IN THERE (A PAYING CUSTOMER WHOS NEVER ABUSED ANY OF THE FACILITIES) ALL THE HOMELESS HAVE TO GET OUT?????? Yes that's correct. The big crusty prick who's job is probably the worst thing ever to exist decides to chuck us all out. At this point I'm on my way to livid. What have I done I'm at it. You know what you done he's at it. Im calling the police he's at it. Call the police I'm at it. Out he's at it. In I'm at it. Out I'm actually out now. Shouting my mouth off on snapchat cause I've never been homeless discriminated against in my life. Baring in mind Liam I haven't seen since I lost him this morning and I only met an hour before we went McDonalds anyway. Granted when he left, I left. But not because I was in the wrong, because if anything he was my case study and at that time he was still intriguing. So yes here I am outside IN THE RAIN. Don't know why I'm capitalising IN THE RAIN like I didn't intend to anyway but it's different when it's a choice and not a command. Anyway I'm going back in McDonald's before these two weeks are up and he can deal with it! if he rings the police so mother fucking be it.
RAIN
I would be telling lies if I didn't admit I think at least 3 times a day, "go home, get in bed, no one will know!" Or even "why the fuck did you voluntarily sign up for this again?" But to extend my honestly further I'd also be lying if I didn't admit I've thought that through every shift I've ever worked, every task I've ever partook in whilst overly tired or have to be up overly early for. And it's one thing to think it and another to do it! Which I haven't! And after meeting a certain fella certainly will not do but as I'm writing this to capture my mindset pre meeting him I'm just reflecting really! Anyway, there I am, due to my snapchat rant about that McDonald's incident, people are snap chatting me left right and centre and I'm trying to reply but the intensity of this rain means I have to extend my phone deep into crevices next to places with free wifi in order to try and reply! After about 10 minutes I decide, fuck that, I'll reply tomorrow, or later, or whatever, I'm getting wet and I need to vacate this area. Then it happened. From this moment onwards things happen so perfectly coincidentally I literally had to screenshot my camera to prove it actually happened in this order.

SARAH THE SAVIOUR AND THE FIRST THREE DRAGS OF A ZOOT.
So, imagine this! 6ft odd black man, hood up, backpack the size  of a Mini Cooper, layers upon layers of jumpers, jackets and coats meaning I'm appearing like either A. A gym rat or B. A fat twat. Waving from the other side of the road trying to track you down! Now imagine you're a attractive black young woman, who probably has to decline advances from men many times a day. What would you do? Pretend you never saw the figure across the road and your earphones are so loud that you couldn't hear him trying to flag you down? Block out your peripheral vision? Pick up the pace and hope he goes away? Same! As did she. To be fair it's slightly weird that I actually ran across the road to attract her attention! And no it wasn't because the zoot, I wasn't even aware she had one. But to fully grasp the situation I'll need to do a quick back story!
-- So few months ago I'm at a night at the live lounge (a venue that has since been tarnished due to the man who works there being inconsistent and not showing up to a night my friend put on and promoted which everyone was excited for. Different story.) anyway, we leave because we was in v.i.p all night and the reason we went in the first place had finished. Which was fumez has finished performing. So we're outside and this girls crying, I'm pissed, with only boys, bored by boyish antics I start talking to this girl who's upset about her own issue, but said she liked my dungarees! So we was bound to get along, anyhow she took a random picture of me with my permission said she was doing a uni project on denim or dungarees can't remember but it was to be used as primary imagery. Fast forward few weeks, my childhood friend happens to be on the same course as this girl, and Instagram DM's me a picture of me in dungarees and odd shoes and fishnets looking like a prostitute outside the rave saying my course mate has this pic in her sketch book and I said I know you and she's wondering if you'll model for her in out uni fashion show in January. So I say yes, express the strangeness, but it's about November so I'm not thinking about that fashion show yet, probably just assumed it wouldn't happen. Fast forward to January, although I'd since had both on Instagram I delete my account out of impulse one day and then Facebook messaged the girl when I remembered, randomly, she needed me now I'm ghosting so anyway she's like "yeah meant to message you its January 16th" whatever whatever. So fast forward to Jan 16th (could've been the 12th or any number really but that's irrelevant) so I arrive to do the fashion show but in typical Boston style I'm late (by about 15 mins) so I get to Salford crescent train station and the girl from the night out (Mel) and another 2 girls are waiting! One happens to be Sarah. Who is a girl I instantly recognise from both college and one year at parklife (potentially 2013) we were all at the front for like Iggy Azalea. Anyway Sarah is the other girls model! She's also one of those people who you've always thought were like cool or whatever but never had any mutual friends or a bridge to communicate. So at the fashion show anyway we all became like 'friends' so to speak in a may never see you again sort of sense but we like each other you're cool I'm cool it's cool. --
So anyway Sarah also happens to be the girl across the road who I'm trying to attract the attention of. Baring in mind it's dark and I'm wearing homeless couture. I was intending to wave from across the road and keep it moving, but she aired me so I approached her just if anything confirm I'm not a weird rapist or going to beg for money but rather instead just saying hello to the first person I've seen, who I haven't planned to meet who I recognise. So anyway she's like omg woah didn't know it was you we share in the moment and she offers me some of the zoot. Never been happier to see a zoot in my life, I'm basically basking in her glory like wow you're a star thank you, be the mother to my children. Anyway I took 3 tokes and passed it back. If you're not intending to share a zoot, and you see a semi stranger, who initially scared you, and now they're hogging your zoot its really not what you signed up for. So kept it moving, said you're going on my blog as it was the second most eventful thing to happen at that point second to maccies. Said bye, I was happy. Then...
 

 

RAIN (NEW LEASE OF LIFE)

All of a sudden, my music is louder, and it sounds 60% better! Only way I can describe it is, the experience so far was a regular packet of Maryland cookies, but now all of a sudden the regular packet has turns into a 100% EXTRA FREE! packet. So I'm just loving life over all because of the weed I'm thinking. The experience became so much more bearable. I wasn't bearing it all actually. I was enjoying it! It was sick! The rain that had been pissing me off I was literally now dancing in! On my own, in the rural city centre outskirts about 12am. I'm singing Estelle and this is where it all started really! I'll bullet point my thoughts and actions:
- My brain doesn't understand what's going on it's like my first ever zoot!
- Since when I first decided to do this whole homeless thing I was high, to be honest I hadn't understood since starting it what I was thinking fully until now. Being high again kind of returned me immediately back to the mindset I was in when I wrote the initial status.
- Just felt so much better than before, I was planning how to improve my blog, and easier ways to format posts.
- I felt as though I had bare tabs opening all of which were something revolutionary.
- I was taking selfies with nice graffitied backgrounds and pictures of closed shutters just overall capturing the beauty of Manchester for the first time, just as I honestly was getting bored of looking at it.
- Inspired me to capture the beauty of homlessness, if there is any.
This really made me appreciate the mindset a homeless drug addict may adopt whilst on the streets. If a few puffs of a joint for me can heighten my experience so much creatively, or at least make me believe it is, I can only imagine how a stronger drug, like the ones seen on this blog previously could act as comfort blanket. If not a comfort blanket, maybe a form of self medication or even a distraction! I can understand, obviously I cant comprehend fully, but I can understand that actually, something's to some people are vital to cope. I used to smoke weed to make my shifts at Krispy Kreme pass quicker, usually resulting in me dropping the tongs and messing up orders, but just because it helps doesn't mean it makes it easier.

 

MATT!!!!!!
First of all it was his birthday yesterday! Happy birthday brother. It's once again probably best to bullet point like I usually do:
- So there I am, high and happy, been dancing, singing and acting in a way that if anyone saw, they'd assume I wasn't just high on marijuana. Creative juices flowing and I just want to draw! Then I see Matt. Drawing on the floor, I immediately parked up next to him and chatted to him for hours.
- He put his pencil down to chat and I accidentally broke it with my bag, a few minutes later, it snapped. He said he was gutted and I immediately felt guilty, so I gave him new pens, sharpies, pencils and could not apologize enough!
- He then said, don't worry not the worst thing to happen to me today. Here's ANOTHER list of things that had happened that day:
A. His pet died. I assumed dog so I enquired how it died etc. Turns out it was his pet mouse which he'd had a year. He explained how he'd tried to resuscitate it four times that day however he thinks it may have eaten something with rat poison hence why he died. I couldn't believe my ears. He claimed he used to let his mouse Marley run around and he'd always return back! After expressing my deepest condolences he simply replied "gutted. shit happens" which really hit home as I felt like by this point he was much more used to saying this than anyone should be.
B. He's been homeless for '5 years and 3 weeks' on this day. the fact he still knows the weeks makes me believe he still has hope that it wont be forever. Or that everyday is so grueling he has vivid memories of each; I'm sure this is very possible as unlike home where you can sleep to pass the hours, watch Hollyoaks or even comfort eat. loosely based on me. However on the streets, you sleep less, and with little distractions other than drugs, pets and whatever hobbies you can achieve with such limited resources, you really are accountable for every minute of everyday. So, that's over 2,628,000 minutes (the amount of minutes in 5 years!) 525,600 of these minutes he had his pet mouse for!
C. He was told by someone who he asked for change off of that he should "do the world a favor and drop dead!" he continued to reveal he was actually doing to kill himself that day! I tried to prevent this but I knew whilst I was sat with him he was safe!
D. He was told by another person, he wasn't giving him anything because he'd only spend it on spice! He was adamant that he'd to this day never taken spice and he "would never go near that shit!"
- He then said he was going to make me a gift that 'I had no choice other than to accept!' his words, I was NOT reluctant to accept the gift, although I was apprehensive to what it was going to be! he continued to create an origami bird, which could also conceal a joints worth of weed if folded differently. In addition to this it could also fold flat and he said if I looked after it would last forever in reply to my "wow! I hope it doesn't get wet!"
- If he had one wish he'd "wish to be back in a bed!" which is sad! Especially since he later revealed that he was attacked and ended up in a coma in hospital. He was attacked in his sleep by an unknown person and had all of his things stolen! When in hospital he developed a major blood clot in his leg and they told him they'd have to amputate it! He "told them to FUCK OFF" and he still has his leg to this day! If he'd of listened he'd be in a wheelchair now!
- The reason he was planning to kill himself last night was because he tried to raise enough money to get a bed and breakfast for his birthday but he didn't even raise enough to get food! He said three times "people have no idea!" each time he said it hit home a little harder! "Do they think people would do this for fun? do they think ANYONE chooses to be homeless!?"
- He preferred weed to spice he said, as he'd never touched spice! Although, he got so fed up whilst I was next to him he began to ask passers by for spice! Said he'd never tried it but he only wanted two puffs which he hoped would knock him out!
- He'd been in the same spot (outside Arndale fish market! for 3 years straight and for the past 15 days he's been soaked through! I gave him some clothes at this point when they were wet, like everything in my bag at that point he said that they'd dry and offered survival tips. 1. sleep with your shoes off, so your feet can breathe, otherwise they'll hurt. 2. double wrap all items in two carrier bags in order to keep them dry! I later went to the spar and bought 50p worth of bags and split them between us two, giving the other 50p change to Mr. Joyce from yesterday as was sat near the shop and Matts story had moved me so much I just wanted to help and put my own selfish feelings about McDonalds aside!
- His friend, took Marley Doran Crawshaw, his dead mouse in a iPhone 7 box to Middleton to bury it where she'd buried her dead rats previously! He said Marley would've loved the box! "that's right that innit, classy!"
Although the past two days have been an experience, to be completely honest, I wasn't 100 percent believing what I was doing it for, I knew I was doing a good thing however I couldn't quite see why it was good, other than being told it was brave and courageous! Until Matt all I'd really done was meet people who'd confirmed the stereotypes that people believed already and probably caused them to show disinterest and or ignore them completely! A man, on his 40th birthday, who was about to kill himself, I found drawing, who only had what he was wearing, a duvet, an empty bad containing pencils and other precious belongings, nothing like home comforts, housed people need. Made ME, a gift! On HIS birthday! Although I gifted him back he made me feel for the first time genuinely sad, however motivated to do something great! The other stuff id seen I'd already been numb to! Heroin? Seen that lying about as a kid, from my drug addict mum! Even the talk of prison, I'd heard a million times. Even some of the things Matt said I was numb to more than others, such as suicide attempts, I grew up in a house where my grandmother would pretend to overdose on pills as a reaction to me not taking towels upstairs! I was used to that. But I'd never seen someone SO desperate, I'd heard stories, seen films etc but NEVER SAT AND CHATTED WITH A MAN WITH NOTHING. ON HIS BIRTHDAY AND ALSO THE DAY HIS PET DIED. It was gut wrenching and I'm rarely compassionate!

MATT LET ME RECORD FOOTAGE OF HIM WHERE HE DESCRIBES THE TIME A WOMAN KIDNAPPED HIM, THE TIME A POLICE WOMAN SPEARED HIM DOWN FROM SCAFFOLDING DURING HIS LAST SUICIDE ATTEMPT AND ALSO HIS BIGGEST HOPES AND DREAMS, WHICH WEIRDLY AT ONE POINT WAS TO MAKE HIS OWN MAGAZINE. HE WANTED HIS MAGAZINE ON EACH PAGE TO HAVE A VOUCHER FOR THINGS SUCH AS FREE DESSERT IF YOU EAT AT ..., FREE SECOND PINT IF YOU BUY ONE BETWEEN THESE HOURS. ETC ETC. A FANTASTIC IDEA THAT WOULD BOTH BOOST BUSINESS SALES FOR WHEREEVER THE VOUCHER WAS FOR, WHILST BOOSTING HIS MAGAZINE SALES. HE. IS. TRULY. REMARKABLE.
FIND THAT FOOTAGE ON THE UPCOMING DOCUMENTARY!